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| Report: | Welcome to the brand new 2025/26 season and the big licks of division 3 plays host to our humble Whitby club.
Tonight, our first home game of the season is against a bookies early favourite to win the league Warrington 2. Whitby fear no team in our pursuit of greatness or in this case our pursuit of survival.
Up first with a prompt 7pm start was Hemmo v’s Scott, very tough test on paper for Hemmo and likely the key to the bonus points. Scott showed that the moment Hemmo got lose with his shots it was going to be game over but Hemmo was up for it tonight and applied the pressure keeping the ball away from the centre and causing Scott all kinds of trouble. Despite his best efforts in the 3rd game Scott just didn’t know what hit him and Hemmo proved too much for him as his hard work paid off winning the match 3-0 and sending Scott for an early shower.
Next to get going was John v the NWCSL legend that is Robbie Blair Snr. Last time these 2 played Robbie was still on a different time zone having just gotten off a plane and John surprisingly won the match 3-0. He was about to find out what it feels like playing him when he’s on GMT. Unfortunately for John, who was struggling to get his ankle to move, he was playing against someone with the ability to pick out anywhere on the court with a flick of the wrist, the amount of ubers that where taken by John got him on the loyalty bonus scheme. Thankfully in the 2nd game john was able to increase the tempo but to no avail overall as Robbie’s skill and experience took control of the tie levelling the match to 1-1 on the night.
Next on we have Fletch who has been thrown into the lions’ dens by Whitby this season v’s Pete. Fletch with his unique style of play can certainly catch people out in this division and that was on display in the 1st game. Fletch keeping the ball tight down the lines and pinning his opponent to the back before his eagle esq wing span cut out Pete’s attempted crosscourts to good effect. Pete however was able to counter this style of play and to be fair was levels above Fletch and once he got to grips with it completely took charge of the tie and inflicted Fletch’s heaviest defeat to date putting Warrington in the lead 2-1. Never mind Fletch we go again son!!
So up steps Whitby’s talisman and new dad Charlie v’s Dan. Charlie on the back of his first defeat in 2 years last week promised his beloved Pip that it would be the only time she had to stay up late for another man this season and was true to his word. Dan didn’t get a look in and all the moaning and complaining to the marker wasn’t going to help him. Charlie has been warned, no more strange men can disturb his missus again all season, she needs her rest. 2-2 on the night.
So final match of the night and for the Thursday night bragging rights up steps Joe taking on a very talented Christine. This was the closest match of the night with both players playing some great squash. Hard hitting and great movement around court by the pair of them but it was Christine who blinked first and Joe took a deserved 2-0 lead. After a pep talk Christine came back fighting and her serves came back with snow on the ball. Joe was struggling to maintain the rhythm he had in the previous 2 games and Christine took full advantage and showed her supporters on the balcony this was anything but over pulling a game back making it 2-1. Time for the Whitby boys to find their voice and rally behind Joe. The 4th game started well for Christine and it was a battle of deep hitters. Joe kept Christine on her forehand and at the back of the court then applying the drop at the right time. Christine struggling to stay in the game tried her luck with the marker for a desperate ask to no avail. In the closing stages Christine continued to find herself on the wrong side of the markers decisions before wild accusations started getting blurted out. Now you can call Hemmo a lot of things and he will deserve most of them. Just of the top of my head here is a list of justifiable names you can call him;
Delinquent
Mental
Unstable
Bellend
Lover of the Salmon
Delusional
Bunnies Hater
Posh C@#t
Different gravy
But you can’t call him a cheat, that’s where we draw the line! Christine was frustrated by the decisions but they were justified calls. Take nothing away from the fine display of squash by both players and it was Joe who edge it out and gave Whitby their first win of the season and makes us undefeated at home!
The real story of the night was the debut of the new menu on offer at the Whitby club. Gone are the days of slow cooker tinned curry and rice and hello to our new Chinese buffet!! We just need to get the courts spruced up and we will be the best club in the whole North West Counties, I’m joking, we already are !!!
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| Author: | John Hamilton |
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